Love and Leather 2019

Fuck Your Box! D/s for the rest of usStephanos & Shay

Get out of the box and create your own unique power exchange dynamic! This class is about breaking away from “traditional” D/s or M/s to formulate relationship models and protocols that are unique to YOU.

Stefanos & Shay will draw from their years of experience in an unconventional D/s relationship to discuss & demonstrate the use of creative protocols to establish headspace for a scene, including applying the concept of  “flow” to make your scenes soar. They will start with verbal protocols, focused on manners of address and communicating within the “mood” of your dynamic (particularly from the s-type’s perspective). Next they’ll cover physical protocols, with a focus on position training. The class is peppered with insights gleaned from positive psychology and applying relationship research to D/s, because science is sexy!

Know the Difference – JodiB

Knowing the difference between what is BDSM and what is intimate partner abuse can be a grey area. Jodi is the NLA-I Domestic Violence Project representative for the western US and helps to make those definitions more black and white. She talks about abuse vs. healthy BDSM, prevention, and polyamorous, Master/slave, sex worker, trans, submissive, Dominant, and deaf considerations. We also discuss abuse based on size, age, and physical ability.

Tradition & Ritual: What Is / is Not Important – JodiB

We are ‘raised’ in Leather hearing about how tradition is so important. But is it? Is tradition what we think? Where do ‘leather traditions’ come from? How can we create our own traditions and rituals for our leather families and communities.

Flexible Boundaries / Firm Limits – Marcia Baczynski

How do you use boundaries not only to keep things you don’t want out, but also to let the good stuff in? How do you set limits when you love someone? What do you do when something feels okay in one context, but not in another?

In this active and interactive workshop, we’ll explore the difference between your boundaries and limits, and discover what it feels like to find and set both. You’ll learn how context changes your boundaries and learn tools for keeping your boundaries and limits intact when someone pushes against them. And, you’ll learn how boundaries can be a tool for expanded generosity and kindness.

The empty collar: D/s breakups, from a submissive’s perspective – Tillie & Ben

No one likes a breakup, and the breakup of a D/s dynamic can be particularly devastating. We will look at why and how we invest in D/s dynamics. We will discuss the particular losses entailed in the dissolution of power-based relationships. Finally, we will examine strategies for accessing our sense of self and our resilience following a break up. We will not only cover ‘normal’ breakups, but also look at aspects of abusive power-dynamics.

A Different Kind of Dominance: Daddy Doms – Yoseñio V. Lewis

There are a variety of ways of exhibiting dominance in a given dynamic.  One in particular is the status of Daddy Dom, incorporating the control of a Dominant with the support and guidance of a Daddy.

Come share space with a Daddy Dom and find out what makes him and his relationships different.  Through role play, interactive exercises and verbal shares we’ll investigate what the differences are, how to challenge the stereotypes of how a Dominant behaves and celebrate the point of view of the Daddy Dom.

Renaming Desire: Trans/Non-Trans Sex – Yoseñio V. Lewis

Even in 2019 the notion of sex between trans and non-trans people strikes fear and curiosity in many queer people.  For trans people, how to come out and express one’s desire and physical/mental make up to a non-trans person remains a monumental hurdle.  For non-trans people, how to acknowledge, accept and engage in a mutual sexual attraction with a trans person and risk rejection from various communities remains a hurdle.  Within those concerns lie the issues of exoticization, race, class and plain old sexual mechanics! Our goals in this workshop are to provide an open atmosphere for people to address these issues, as well as to look at the state of sex-positivity in the queer movement.  We encourage people to attend, learn and go away from the workshop having gained insight into how to have responsible, meaningful and FUN sex!

But Wait, There’s More!  Exploring the Intersections of Race, Class, Ability, Sexuality and MORE with BDSM/Kink – Yosenio

They look so good and cause that familiar thump, thump, thump in your jeans and brain.  You want to do more than have casual chat with them…and then the fear comes up. What about the difference?  Will they say no because of it? Will you shy away from asking or pleading because of it? What happens when kink interests bump up against race, class, ability, sexuality, health (mental and physical) or healthcare access and/or political changes to the environment?  Join us as we explore the intersections of race, class, ability and more with BDSM.

Ø   KA POW the notion that race has to be fetishized!
Ø  PUNCH up the connection between kink and politics!
Ø  SPLAT the silent hunger between BDSM and ability!
Ø  KRUSH the fear of mental health distancing kink desire!
Ø  ZAP the chasm between BDSM and class!

We want to have an exciting, thick, rich, pulsating conversation on the intersections of race, class, ability, health, sexuality and politics with Kink.  Bring your questions, bring your desires, bring your address books! ALL are welcome!

Humiliation For Those Without Shame – Lady Umbra & prairie locked

Be amused and bemused as Lady Umbra and her slave, prairie_locked share their sheer joy of humiliation play and showcase how they include it daily within their power exchange dynamic. You will quickly learn why their relationship is often described as a Queen and her court jester. Watching these two dig through their Tickle Trunk will be sure to bring back memories of Mr. Dressup, but with a kinky twist!

The workshop will cover planning, negotiating, and providing aftercare for extreme humiliation scenes, before illustrating many of the quirky ways they incorporate humiliation play into their power exchange.

Trigger warning: this is an edge play workshop and contains content that can trigger participants (sometimes in unexpected ways).

Reverse Bootblacking: Just Try To Get Out Of MY Chair! – Lady Umbra & prairie locked

The presenters, Lady Umbra and prairie_locked, are both bootblacks. However, prairie_locked is Lady Umbra’s slave, and she has given him the task of always making sure that her boots are gleaming. This makes Lady Umbra and her slave happy, but it presented a dilemma for Lady Umbra when trying to come up with ideas for boot play scenes. Although she is a bootblack, how could she possibly Top a boot scene with her slave while polishing her slave’s boots? Both her and her slave need to have shiny boots (that’s the equity), but Lady Umbra is the Master and a Sadist. So Lady Umbra found some ways of maintaining the inequality in their relationship while polishing her slave’s boots and still Topping the scene. If this seems like a contradiction to you, then check out this workshop! It begins with a brief “Bootblacking 101” illustrating basic techniques. Lady Umbra and her slave will then discuss and demonstrate a number of ways for the Top to actually perform the bootblacking during a boot play scene.